


Misfits Group Chat

by Dopple_Girl



Category: The Misfits (Podcast)
Genre: College AU, because I said so, i was bored and fight me, im not good at group chats, mention of drugs, more characters are going to be added, of course there is, this might have a plot idk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-07-16
Packaged: 2020-04-07 12:50:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,834
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19085401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dopple_Girl/pseuds/Dopple_Girl
Summary: This is absolute fucking Chaos since boys who do drugs in college and are just chaotic shits should not be in a group chat together





	1. Message One - Formation

** CAMERON started the chat! **

** CAMERON named the chat “Group Project Cunts” **

** CAMERON added ERIC and MATT to the chat **

 

Cameron: Alright Cunts what we doing about this goddamn English project

 

Eric: can’t high

 

Matt: hi, Matt’s roommate Jay here. Matt is off his mind on 9 edibles

 

Cameron: 9? Aren’t those 100 mili each?

 

Matt: Yep

Matt: Also ...

 

** MATT changed their name to iNutterButter **

 

iNutterButter: that’ll be fun when he not off his mind

 

Cam: Cna I have one?

Cam: *Cam

Cam: *Can. FUCK

 

iNutterButter: Nah, Swagger has the last one

 

Cam: Swagger?

 

**ERIC changed their name to Swagger [High]**

 

Swagger [High]: Sup

 

Cam: how are you communication?

Cam: not fixing that

 

Swagger [High]: I am a highly functioning stoner 

Swagger [High]: Pluss I didn’t take nine fucking edibles

 

iNutterButter: Matt is not here to make a sarcastic retort, please a message after the beep

iNutterButter: BeeP

 

Cam: god I’m going to have to be responsible for once to get anything done

 

**CAM changed their name to Fitz This Mess**

 

Fitz This Mess: also, nothing is getting done on this group project

 

Swagger [High]: noPe

 

Fitz This Mess: you somehow managed to pop a p in text and I applaud you. 

Fitz This Mess: Now lets change the stupid chat name

 

**Swagger [High] renamed the chat “We’re Doing Drugs”**

**Fitz This Mess renamed the chat “DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS”**

 

Swagger [High]: I’m only keeping that since I’m too lazy and my roommate just brought me Tom the Dank Engine

 

**iNutterButter added JAY to the chat**

**JAY changed their name to creamsTHICCle**

 

creamsTHICCle: nobody tells Matt any of this. 

 

Fitz This Mess: God this is chaos already and there’s only three of us here. 


	2. Message Two - Adoption

_** DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS ** _

 

Swagger [High]: Hi! I’m starting a GoFund me for my roommate’s bail. Helpful if you guys donated

 

iNutterButter: Yeah I’m gonna need more than that

iNutterButter: Also why is my name this?

 

Fitz This Mess: ^^

Fitz This Mess: The first not second

 

Swagger [High]: He said he was leaving to either get ice cream or commit a felony but he wasn’t sure which 

 

Fitz This Mess: Just add him here

 

Swagger [High]: I think it’ll be the ladder

Swagger [High]: ok

 

iNutterButter: *latter

 

Swagger [High]: stfu Matt

 

iNutterButter: also name

 

**Swagger [High] added MASON to the chat**

 

Mason: Sup cunts. 

Mason: Also, Swagger what flavor you want

 

Swagger [High]: oh thank fuck

 

Mason: Nevermomd they won’t let me in cause I have no clothes

 

Swagger [High]: MASON!!

 

Fitz This Mess: where are you I’m bringing you clothes

 

Mason: y?

 

Fitz This Mess: I’ve had yo for two mins and he’s my son now. Where?

 

**Fitz This Mess changes their name to Fitz the Father**

**Swagger [High] changed MASON’s name to Convicted Cunt**

 

Convicted Cunt: [Location Sent]

 

Fitz the Father: On my way

Fitz the Father: Change the name

 

Swagger [High]: No fucka you

 

iNutterButter: Nobody has told me who changed me name

 

creamsTHICCle: That’s What happens when you take 9 edibles

 

iNutterButter: I Fucking Knew It

 


	3. Message Three - Let’s Get Gayer

_**DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS ** _

 

iNutterButter: guys I just met the best person ever and I want to ass him

 

creamsTHICCle: damn Matt. I knew you were gay but not THAT gay 

 

iNutterButter: *add

iNutterButter: you don’t get a say in this

 

creamsTHICCle: I’m here so I do <3

 

iNutterButter: does someone have an emoji for the vine where the guy throw the love in the blender

 

Fitz the Father: who’s the guyv

 

iNutterButter: this dude who I met

iNutterButter: threw Glitter Bomb at homophobes

 

**Swagger [High] changed their name to 0 days w/o Drugs**

 

iNutterButter: So. Much. Glitter. 

iNutterButter: Really?

 

0 days w/o Drugs: Sorry, continue

 

creamsTHICCle: pics?

 

iNutterButter: better. Video

iNutterButter: [Video Sent]

 

( _Video begins. Part of Matt’s face is shown with three guys in the background. They’re screaming homophobic slurs away from Matt. The camera turns to an open window, where a Rainbow Pride Flag is flying. A man pops out, yells “Jealous Cishets are Illegal!!” Before throwing a balloon out the window. Camera follows it to the ground, where it explodes all over the four men. Men as disgusted and walk away mumbling. Matt still sits there, stunned, with Glitter all over his back. He makes no effort to move. End of Video.)_

Convicted Convict: how does someone fit that much glitter into a balloon

 

0 days w/o Drugs: the world may never know

 

creamsTHICCle: glorious

 

iNutterButter: Permision to add him?

 

0 days w/o Drugs: I think it’s a crim if you don’t

 

Fitz the Father: omg that’s fucking Toby. 

 

iNutterButter: YOU KNOW HIM?!?!

 

Fitz the Father: THATS MY BEST FRIEND

 

0 days w/o Drugs: I THOUGHT I WAS YOUR BEST FRIEND

 

Convicted Cunts: I WANT TO FUCK SOMETHING

 

Fitz the Father: that’s for contributing, son. 

 

iNutterButter: 

_creamsTHICCle: just add him, Fitz or iNutt_

_iNutterButter: yeah I’ve got to change this name to something creative_

**Fitz the Father added TOBY to the chat!**

 

Toby: the QUEEn has arrived, bitches

Toby: Hey Cam

 

Fitz the Father: Hey Toby

Fitz the Father: So, glitter bombing homophobia is your strategy now?

 

Toby: id try arson, but that’s technically illegal

 

Convicted Cunt: I like him

 

0 days w/o drugs: of course you do, Mason

 

**Toby changed their name to Dominant Gay**

 

creamsTHICCle: whos the sub

 

Dominant Gay: Everyone else

 

creamsTHICCle: F for the straights

 

Convicted Cunt:  🔪

 

0 days w/o Drugs:  💣

 

Dominant Gay:  🔥

 

Fitz the Father: why are my children like this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just to avoid confusion, after Fitz says “that’s for contributing, son.” Matt sends the Will Smith Image Of hes a little confused but he got the spirit. I couldn’t figure out how to work images because I do things on Mobile. So, hopeful that helps a little. And again, hope you enjoy!!


	4. Message 4 - The Band’s all here

**_DONT DO FUCKIG DRUGS_ **

 

Dominant Gay: so very important question 

Dominant Gay: am I the only homo here?

 

iNutterButter: no I too take dick

iNutterButter: but I like the closet tho

 

Dominant Gay: understood, have a nice day

 

0 days w/o Drugs: I’m bi and high

 

Convicted Cunt: Is vape lord a sexuality?

 

0 days w/o Drugs: should be but no

 

creamsTHICCle: I’m Demi BiRomantic

 

Convicted Cunt: then whatever the Spanish bread one is

 

Dominant Gay: Pan?

 

Convicted Cunt: that or whatever

 

0 days w/o Drugs: masons so chill about this y ain’t everyone?

 

Dominant Gay: What about Fitz?

 

iNutterButter: I thought you guys were bfs?

 

Dominant Gay: Please let that stand for best friends 

 

iNutterButter: it does I’m stupid

iNutterButter: Also, while I remember

 

**iNutterButter changed their name to King of Edibles**

**0 days w/o Drugs changed King of Edibles name to Reckless with Edibles**

 

Reckless with Edibles: yeah okay that’s fair

 

creamsTHICCle: thanks Swagger

 

Dominant Gay: @‘Fitz the Father ArE yOu GaY oR nOt?!

 

Fitz the Father: No comment

 

0 days w/o Drugs: I’m curios now tho tell or be kicked

 

Fitz the Father: I created this char you can’t 

Fitz the Father: *chat

 

**Fitz the Father has been voted off the island!**

 

0 days w/o Drugs: watch me bitch

 

creamsTHICCle: cool exit message

 

Reckless with Edibles: I think there’s a setting

 

Convicted Cunt: I WANT TO GET KICKED

 

**Fitz the Father has their position reinstated!**

 

Dominant Gay: We can kick him AFTER we figure out if he’s gay. 

 

0 days w/o Drugs: FiNe. 

 

Fitz the Father: I’m queer

 

creamsTHICCle: And?

 

Fitz the Father: that’s it. That’s as much as I know. 

Fitz the Father: What more do you cunts want?

 

0 days w/o Drugs: he stays for now

 

Dominant Gay: Also, can you guys use she/her pronouns for me?

Dominant Gay: I’m … trans actually. And I like women. 

 

Reckless with Edibles: we stan one queen, and her name is Toby

 

**Dominant Gay renamed the chat “Fitz and the Gays”**

 

Fitz the Father: I’m also something gay but okay

 

0 days w/o Drugs: it’s our new band name just roll with it

 

Convicted Cunt: I call drummer

 

creamsTHICCle: backup singer so I can say I was there when everything went to shit

 

Reckless with Edibles: Band Drug Dealer

 

0 days w/o Drugs: That’s my job wym

 

Reckless with Edibles: Okay. 

Reckless with Edibles: I’m the manager who doesn’t give a shit but is mom same time

 

0 days w/o Drugs: You’re Hired!

 

Dominant Gay: Fitz, you want guitar or lead?

 

Fitz the Father: We are NOT starting a band!!

 

Dominant Gay: I repeat the question

Dominant Gay: Fitz, you want guitar or lead?

 

Fitz the Father: *sigh*

Fitz the Father: Guitar

 

**0 days w/o Drugs renamed the chat “Toby and her Bois”**

 

Fitz the Father: we’ve had this band two minutes and already we’re changing th name?

 

0 days w/o Drugs: Leas always get spotlight 

 

Convicted Cunt: Dad it’s official!!! I’m in a band!!

 

Dominant Gay: I’m not complaining

Dominant Gay: I’ve got my spotlight, ice got my boys

 

Fitz the Father: I know and I’m proud, Mason

 

Dominant Gay: my work here is done

 

creamsTHICCle: so who’s gonna write our first single?

 

Reckless with Edibles: yeah the band think probably won’t work out


	5. Chapter 5

_** Toby and her Bois ** _

creamsTHICCle: which dumbass is willing to take me to the raid on Area 51??? 

Fitz the Father: were Kiwis?????

0 days w/o Drugs: why go there when I’m an alien right here?  👽

Dominant Gay: New Horror Movie

Dominant Gay: The Creature under the Helmet

Reckless with Edibles: I’d pay to see that

  **0 days w/o Drugs changed their name to Area 51 Reject**

Area 51 Reject: We apart of the Kyles or Naruto Rumners?

Dominant Gay: Clearly the minecrafters in the back digging their way in

Reckless with Edibles: I call texting the aliens were here 

Fitz the Father: We are NOT going to the Area 51 raid

creamsTHICCle: hey google how do I cancel 6 plane tickets to Nevada

Dominant Gay: [Image Sent]

( _Image is an Facebook event slated for Sunday September 1st at 8AM. Title reads, “Kayak from Melbourne to Area 51 coz can’t afford a plane ticket.” Location is the St Kilda Pier in Victoria, Australia)_

Dominant Gay: We go without him

Reckless with Edibles: We about to go HAM on the US alien base

Area 51 Reject: We’ve got Shaggy, Chuck Norris, Betty White and Keanu Reeves. What can go wrong?

Fitz the Father: my children

Fitz the Father: y Tho

creamsTHICCle: You’re not my dad! 

Fitz the Father: I am your dad now get out of the fucking tank

creamsTHICCle: I’m in a tank and you’re not!

Convicted Cunt: He’s my dad fuck off, cunt

Reckless with Edibles: Thank you, Mason, for the contribution to the conversation 

Fitz the Father: Mason, I’m not just your dad

Convicted Cunt: I want a sister tho

Convicted Cunt: and an alien

Dominant Gay: he’s on our side!!

Fitz the Father: why are you all against me?!?!?!

Area 51 Reject: because you a buzzkill not letting us live our alien meme dreams

creamsTHICCle: We will get aliens, no matter what

Dominant Gay: I will use you as a sacrifice if I have to

Fitz the Father: Find. When is this thing

Reckless with Edibles: We’re not saying because we’re not inviting you 

Fitz the Father: omfg really?

Area 51 Reject: Area 51 is a Fitz free zone. 


End file.
